Trusting God

 

6 years ago I experienced one of, if not THE, deepest hurts I've had in this life.

No...my husband wasn't unfaithful.  My children are all healthy.  I was not involved in violence.  I have not had major health issues.  My hurt was heart related.  

My heart was broken...shattered.  By those who should've known better.  I was treated badly.  And they should've known better.

You might be thinking that I'm dramatic...a bit of a "hot mess".  And maybe I am.  But this is my hurt, not yours.  And this thing that it's morphed into, has changed my perspective.  It's changed the way I do things.  It's changed the way I make friends and the level of trust I allow another person to stand on.

It's changed my relationship with the LORD.  In good ways...and in some of the most challenging ways I've ever experienced as I've walked with Him.

                                    Trust 

is a much bigger word than I realized it was 6 years ago.  And since that time, I've had to decide if I'm going to...trust others...

trust God.

I've had to decide if I'm going to stay on the island that I retreated to, so long ago.  If I'm satisfied with that.

I told myself for years that it was safer on that island.  That I loved being there.  And my gracious heavenly Father allowed me to stay there for a time.And then He moved me.                  And that island wasn't enough.  

Hearers Only

"Be doers of the Word and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves.  Because if anyone is a hearer of the Word and not a doer, he is like a man looking at his own face in a mirror;  for he looks at himself, goes away, and right away forgets what kind of man he was.  But the one who looks intently into the perfect law of freedom and perserveres in it, and is not a forgetful hearer but a doer who acts -this person will be blessed in what he does.
If anyone thinks he is religious, without controlling his tongue but deceiving his heart, his religion is useless.  Pure and undefiled religion before our God and Father is this:  to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself unstained by the world."  James 1:  22-27

WOW!  Some pretty strong words from God's servant, James, on whether or not we actually live out His Word.  A lot of Christians do not.  They attend church.  They try to do good things.  They donate their unwanted items to Goodwill.  They sing in choir or volunteer for the food drive.  Or both.  Not that those things are bad, but do they produce growth...do they draw our hearts closer to Him...do we even do them for the right reason with the right attitude of humility towards God?

What James is talking about here is having enough humility to seek to be right with God by doing what He says in His Word and not just knowing what it says to do.

If we're honest, we must admit that we struggle with that.

Doing requires action and sacrifice with the right attitude.  But most the time we don't have time for action and sacrifice, and we're too impatient to have the right attitude!

Unless it's sacrificing time to watch our favorite tv show.  Or play on Facebook.  Maybe surf Ebay for some treasure.  Run our kids all over the place to meet commitment requirements that keep us living out of our cars.

That's life, right?

Wrong.

That's absolutely NOT the "doing" that James is talking about OR that God desires for our lives.  The doing that we should be about is personalizing our knowledge of God by studying His Word for our own sake.  So that we remain humble and remember who we are and Who He Is.  
That heart felt attitude will motivate us to put feet to our faith in an extraordinary way.

No PhD can teach us that.  Only our humble attitude to truly know Him in a right relationship with Him will help us choose doing over hearing only.

Take a look at the warning clearly presented to us in this passage:  "deceiving yourselves", "forgets", and "deceiving his heart".  That's some scary stuff to me.  Because if we don't know Christ on an intimate level, we will easily be deceived, forgetting who we are and Who He Is.  Our hearts will be deceived, which leads to a kind of hardening that is not easily changed.  And generally, we don't recognize any of that!



And that's exactly how the devil wants to destroy us.

We must ACT...DO...to avoid losing intimacy with God and being deceived by the devil.  There is no other way.  No degree to save us.  Just a relationship.

With Christ.

29 Again?...

I always joke about my age.  And every birthday, my claim is that I'm "29 again".


But let me say that I'm truly grateful for all the years that God has blessed me with on this Earth.  I'm not gonna lie...there have been some challenging years! This past year was one of those that will be memorable for painful reasons.  But even through it...God has never failed me.  God has never left me.  I still know Christ died for me and because I've given my heart & life to Him, I am His.

My goal is still to pass that on to my children.  My goal is still to pass that on to other people.

People express how amazed they are at Jesus.  At the love of God.  At His goodness.  And I am too.  But one of the most profound things to me about my Jesus...my God...is that He is still there even though I fail.  He's still working even though I'm lazy & don't care.  Even though I lack motivation to move through my day so many times, He's still there speaking.  He's crazy AMAZING for those reasons.  He makes things happen that LET ME KNOW THAT HE KNOWS I'M HERE.  And THAT'S amazing!  Even with His busy schedule, I am His beloved princess.

So I spend another year of my blessed life, trying to hang on and do as I always encouraged my sweet Moms to do when we met for MOPS years ago...

Don't just survive life...whatever stage you're in...but THRIVE.

Some years involve seasons that aren't fun to go through.  But God is still there.  And He wants you to trust Him to fill in the cracks. 

Believe me...over all these birthdays & years...He's done A. LOT. OF. CONSTRUCTION. IN. MY. LIFE.

Happy Birthday to me, Happy Birthday to me, Happy Birthday Carmen Denise...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MEEEEEE!!!!!

I'm Valuable

I had a blessed week.  One of my favorite things about God is that He works and blesses you even when your heart feels sad.  Even when you don't feel like lifting a finger.  Even when you aren't impressed with yourself.

I was able to spend time with 2 of my best friends this week.  When able, we all 3 come together and do crazy things...like sleepovers with all of our kids.  And when I say "kids", I mean ALL 11 minus one (Tyler)!!!!!  And sometimes we just get together to play cards...our favs are Hand & Foot, and Phase 10.  It's always so much fun and totally blesses my heart.
I've pondered this week, how do I change how I view myself?  I think that's an interesting question.  A lot of us are probably raised that spending time thinking about yourself or how to improve yourself, in certain ways, is selfish.  And that's true...for some things.  In fact, some may think that because I'm still struggling, I'm being selfish.  I'm realizing that to stop feeling like I'm not very valuable, I'm going to have to take steps to correct that way of thinking.
I know the truth and where it comes from.
Accepting it is far different.  Especially when you've been hurt inside the church.

Truth:  I'm so incredibly valuable that Christ took my punishment, which was death.  And because of my value to Him, He didn't stop there.  He rose from the grave.  I have victory!  I have already won this hurtful battle concerning my self-worth!

Oh, for it to be so easy as just to say it and believe it!  How I would love to snap my fingers and not care about the hurt.


I've got to spend time in His Bible in order to really believe that I'm THAT valuable.  Easier said than done, but for His sake, worth working on.



Today, I'll read one of the many truths that is part of my anatomy as a believer...& begin trusting God A G A I N, and believing.

Lord knows...

Ummm...yes, He does.

Safe & Secure

In cleaning up my blog, I ran across this entry from 2 years ago that I've never published.  I'm sharing it now because God knew that I needed this today.  Dealing with heartache isn't easy.  Sometimes my mind goes to the dark, and I feel worthless.  But as it says in Psalm 30:6, when I feel secure I can say that I'll never be broken.  Lord, show me today that I am secure in You.  Show me that I am not worthless.  No matter what the world may say, or even how "Godly" people treat me, I am Yours and of great value to You.  Thank You for the many years that You've given me a place in ministry to serve You and Your people, and open up a place for me to do so again. 

Read on, Friends...

My 3 year old sleeps with the light on. I'm not sure why he feels so secure with the light on...after all, if a burgular broke in, wouldn't it be better to hide in the dark? Well...he's only 3! So he's probably thinking that the monsters only come out in the dark! And if he can keep the light on, they won't try to eat him. Never mind that I'll try to eat him. I'm his Mama and I nibble on his toes all the time. And he's used to that.

Sometimes, even with the light, Luke gets scared. Last night, he woke me...or rather his Daddy woke me with a "Carmen...Luke is standing next to you and he's whimpering". So being in the fog I am usually in when I sleep, I scooped him right up and snuggled with him under the covers. Under my electric blanket, actually. What???!!! YOU don't sleep with an electric blanket when it's muggy and 90 degrees outside???!!!! Well I do. But that's a different blog on a different day.

I scooped Luke up...in the complete darkness of my room, and he immediately fell asleep. Why would he fall asleep so easily in MY dark room, but wake up crying in HIS room, even though his light is on??!! He had loving, secure arms around him, of course, and he felt safe.

It reminded me of how we are with our Heavenly Father. In the light of day, things seem fine. Happy and cheerful, even. And when our life is going the way we want it to go, that's true. But when we experience hardship, a lot of times we get scared...even though we have the light of His Word that shines on us...in us...and hopefully through us, all of the time.

He has made us secure in His love and sacrifice. We are safe.

"LORD, you have assigned me my portion and my cup; you have made my lot secure." Psalm 16:5
"Therefore my heart is glad and my tongue rejoices; my body will also rest secure..." Psalm 16:9
"When I felt secure I said, I will never be shaken." Psalm 30:6

When we realize that security, we feel so safe. Just like Luke snuggling up and sleeping...we have to experience God's secure love for us before we can feel safe enough to let go and sleep in His care.
Maybe running into the Father's waiting arms would be exactly what you need.

He's waiting.

And I promise, you'll be safe and secure in Him.

Find Peace in Christ

Disappointment.  Comes in all shapes and sizes, and from people and places that you'd least expect.

Hi.  My name is Carmen Jones, and I struggle with disappointment (think Bruce on Finding Nemo...only fish isn't a weakness for me!).

In John 16:33, Christ tells us to find our peace in Him...He warns us that in this world, we will have trouble, but to take heart because He has overcome the world.

Disappointment in the world is as common as breathing in and out...I understand that.  In the world, we mingle with all walks of people, some of which have absolutely no Godly convictions whatsoever.

Disappointment in the church?  Tough to handle.

If the expectations we place on our church leaders weren't so high, maybe the disappointment wouldn't be so deep.  Our leaders aren't perfect.  And some church leaders may not belong where they are.  We must keep these things in mind when dealing with disappointment within the church.  While there is no excuse for less than kind and gracious behavior from any church leader (in most situations), our example isn't church leadership.  Our example is God.  He's perfect, and He's always working out every situation for our good.  We never have to rely on a god who makes mistakes, one who doesn't love us, or one who has no control over the situations we find ourselves dealing with in life.  Any and everything that crosses our path, has gone through His capable hands, first.

Hmmmm...

That must mean that He has a plan!
Relieved?
Me too!!!

He sees.  He offers the solution.  He warns us of the danger of not exploring that solution.  He encourages us that He's in control.

Disappointment is normal in this life.  It's a fall from expectation.  But if we will turn it over to The Lord, it will be tough to handle...but not impossible.

Hold On Just A Minute

I have a great life.  Great marriage. 5 great kids.  Great relationships with my family and in-laws. Great friends.  It's all just great.

But I don't feel great today.

I feel discouraged and disappointed.

And doesn't it seem that I feel that way often? Why doesn't God rescue me from these feelings? 

Who am I, anyway? 

 Do these feelings define me?

Well...sometimes they do. When I let 'em.

And BOY! Do I get tired of lettin' 'em!!!!!

So what to do about the days we feel blue? Maybe you feel that something in your life is not fair. Maybe you work in a place where there is no excuse for the situations not to be fair! Maybe everyone around you is happy and content in their positions...but you feel defeated and unhappy. Maybe you are wondering when God is going to show up and place value to your feelings, after all...nobody else does!






While feelings can lie and be horribly difficult to deal with, God can and will use those feelings to draw us to Him. And that's so good! Because most of the time that we may feel hopeless, it's because we've tried it all on our own, and put our pointy finger up in the holding pattern, communicating to God, that we want Him to wait a minute.

REALLY???!!!!

Our CREATOR. SAVIOR. REDEEMER. FATHER. FRIEND. DOCTOR. HEALER. ADVISER. COUNSELOR. LIFE'S BREATH...

"Hold on a minute, Lord. I'm doing something here."

"And what might that be?"

"I'm doing what You want me to do!"

"And how do you know what I want you to do?"

"ummm...'cause You told me"

"I did? When was that?"

"A couple of months ago..."

"WOW! You mean to tell Me that you missed what I told you this morning??!!!"

"I didn't miss anything! You told me to do exactly what I'm doing!"

"Dude! You missed a whopper of a blessing this morning because you're doing what you're doing!"

"Then why didn't You tell me?!?!?"

"I did."

Sometimes we get so caught up in ourselves, that we completely and utterly MISS what God had in mind for us! Not to mention the days that we drift through, telling God what we're doing, and asking Him to bless it for us.

What we need to be doing, is walking so close with Him, that it's hard to throw us off track.

But I am certainly tossed around at times. I relate so much to Casting Crowns, when they sing, "I am a flower quickly fading, here today and gone tomorrow...a wave tossed in the ocean, a vapor in the wind...".

I am so unworthy to be able to serve or call upon my Jesus! But the greatest words in this song swell up my heart..."still You, hear me when I'm calling, Lord, You catch me when I'm falling, and You've told me who I am...

I am Yours."

Sometimes, that is all I need to hear.

No matter what happens in a day...or how I am disappointed...I belong to God. And He will spend the rest of my life telling me so...

if I'll put my "wait a minute" finger down.

Beautiful by Bethany Dillion

I was so unique...

Now I feel skin deep.

I count on the make-up to cover it all...

Crying myself to sleep 'cause I cannot keep their attention.

I thought I could be strong, but it's killing me.

Does someone hear my cry?  I'm dying for new life!

I want to be beautiful...

Make you stand in awe.

Look inside my heart, and be amazed.

I want to hear you say Who I am is quite enough.

Just want to be worthy of love,

And beautiful .

Sometimes I wish I was someone other than me,

Fighting to make the mirror happy.

Trying to find whatever is missing...

Won't you help me back to glory?

You make me beautiful!

You make me stand in awe!

You step inside my heart, and I am amazed!

I love to hear You say Who I am is quite enough!

You make me worthy of love and beautiful!

Finding My Way...

My first week not working outside the home in 3 years finds me busy.  Our family is a "Safe Families" family...meaning...we are approved to host the children of parents who are in temporarily difficult situations.This week, we are hosting 4 siblings.  We've had these children once before...for 3 weeks...and the sweet family who received them after us decided to foster them.  This week, that family is out of town and asked if we could host them again.  WOW!  What a change in these precious siblings!  Everything from lighter hair to glasses, to better manners...these children are in the best of care.
 Hosting can be a little bit stressful the first time.  Even with our large family, it's hard to be prepared for a child or children that you don't know.  But there is a common thread among all children.  They need love and consistency.  Once given those 2 things...they will absolutely thrive.
So God is keeping me busy, thankfully.  Helping to keep my mind off of the loss of one of my favorite jobs EVER.  I miss the volunteers and my duties so much.  Loved organizing and equipping people to successfully teach our beautiful young children about the love that God has for them.  Missed all those sweet hugs I usually receive from my little preschoolers...teachers...parents...and the volunteers.  There's nothing like pouring into other people.  Makes my heart soar.  My prayer is that all the years that I've faithfully put into them will live on...that my service has created gold confetti for my Lord to throw around in the air.  I want my service to withstand the fire and honor God.  Really, our life goal should be that very thing...and not because we work at a church.  No matter what you do with the days He gives you, you should do it in such a way as to add to the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow...live in such a way that the fire can't destroy the good works you do for Him.

The siblings are going to camp everyday this week except Thursday, and I'll haul them and mine to the pool for some fun in the sun.  We are also visiting friends this week and possibly a new little church in the hills.  As I go along this week, I'm not only trying to add to my heavenly stash of confetti, but I'm mindful of teaching the siblings, and my own precious children how to do the same.  And to do that...I must show them all the 2 things that will make them thrive.

That will definitely keep me busy.

Nothing More Than Feelings...

Sometimes I wonder if the sunshine will ever come out. There are days, and even weeks when I feel as though it's gone forever.

Key word: feel

Most of the precious people I know would likely be surprised at some of the feelings I have at times. Feelings of... hopelessness...unworthiness...insecurity...
Ever feel like "the world is out to get you"? How about days or weeks that it seems everything goes wrong? Nothing goes right...

Feelings so strong, that nobody can pull me out of...and only God can chip away at them and

reveal the truth.

Ephesians 4:14 tells us, "Then we will no longer be immature like children. We won't be tossed and blown about by every wind of new teaching. We will not be influenced when people try to trick us with lies so clever they sound like the truth."

This scripture is jOLtinG. It doesn't promise perfection. It doesn't say we won't be challenged. But back up a few verses to what the solution to our feelings is...
Ephesians 4:11..."Now these are the gifts Christ gave to the church: the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists, and the pastors and teachers. Their responsibility is to equip God's people to do His work and build up the church, the body of Christ. This will continue until we all come to such unity in our faith and knowledge of God's Son that we will be mature in the Lord, measuring up to the full and complete standard of Christ."

The solution to dealing with feelings that LIE, is to use every available resource that God offers (the knowledge and wisdom of the apostles/prophets/evangelists/pastors/teachers within our church), to draw close together in unity, faith, knowledge of Christ.

Because guess what? If we are unified, and dig into our faith in Christ, and are knowledgeable about the things of God...we can much better believe the truth found in Him, than the lie that we may feel!

Feelings LIE.

God never lies.

His truth is solid. His love cast out fear and doubt. So doesn't it make sense that if we spend time listening to what He says about us...what He says He created us to do...we'd be more likely to believe Him than anyone else?

Thank God for those apostles, prophets, evangelists, pastors, & teachers whom God gifted to bless others with His truth...and those special words that mean so much.

When at times, we feel like giving up...let us take a deep breath, and spare a few moments to let His truth seep into our very bones. He'll embrace our spirit...refresh our soul...and bring us peace.
And that's no lie.

New Life Awaits!

It's been a long time. And despite my promises to try...I haven't been very good at blogging over the past year. My heart still gets full. And I still want what God allows in my heart and life to be a blessing to others, so I'll keep blogging.

My last blog found it's way on here from Winston Salem, NC. So I'll update from there.

After a 6 month battle with lung cancer, I am happy to say that Ma struggles NO MORE!!!!! She officially was made PeRfEcT on November 2nd, 2010, by waking up to stand before her Lord. While this has been so difficult for my family, I have no question that if given the opportunity to come back to this earth, she would firmly refuse. Who WOULD want to come back, after spending ONE SECOND in the very presence of our Creator??!!!??

Christmas was a struggle. And we all deal with pain and heartbreak in different ways. My Mother has "latched on" FIERCELY to Ma's dog, Casey. I think at this point, it might kill her if something happened to him. I was ready to "make" something happen to him, after he bit me...purely unprovoked...when the whole family came together at Mom's house to celebrate Christmas together. And that was AFTER Casey almost took my brother's nose off of his face on the 2nd day of our visit. Jonathan had to go to the emergency room, while Casey had to go into confinement...by order of The Law. And I'm not talking about my law. I'm talking about THE Law. As in blue uniforms. Because Jonathan had to go to the sew-your-face-back-on unit of the hospital, they filed a police report. Casey was in BIG trouble (finally).
Everything turned out well, but Casey won't be making any visits to the Jones household. I'd rather spend my money moving my kids forward in life, rather than having to hold them down on a gurney while some intern attempts to sew their eyeball back in it's socket.

BTW...did I mention that Casey is small enough to put in your purse? He's a Terrier...or Terror, however you want to look at it.

So, we made it through Christmas. And despite our feelings of great loss, we did so with laughter. And of course, MANY tears.

And now it's February. Life goes on. And we're all going on with it.

Ma's birthday is next Tuesday. In earthly numbers, she's 83. In Heaven, she's perfect. No wrinkles. No dentures. No sagging.

No cancer.

No pain.

And I have all ideas, that THIS birthday celebration will be a most incredible event. One that we will mourn.

But one that she will never forget.

In Winston Salem

I'm in Winston. All of the times I've been here have been joyous occassions, save 4...when Grandma Spaugh died, when Uncle Steve died, when Papaw was hospitalized (with heart issues I think) and was pretending that he was fixing food...and I took it from him, saying "thank you for fixing my sandwich, Papaw!" (he looked at me like he did when I was a kid and had done something he wanted to smack me for), and when we buried him. I was hurt all of those times. My Papaw was the only Papaw I've ever known. He was funny, strict, and traditional...the typical Navy man, I suppose. Well, maybe not in this society anymore, but in short, he was the best Papaw, EVER.

I'm in Winston. The majority of my memories of being here are so comforting. When I was a kid, I saw my Grandparents anywhere from 4-6 times a year (they lived a distance away). That increased as I grew older. I remember visiting for a month in the summer, a few times, even. Papaw used to pay me to mow the yard, when I visited during the summer. And Grandma always bought me new shoes. Papaw cooked sausage and baked biscuits (the wimpy canned kind) on Saturday mornings, and Grandma talked & laughed her way through the memories we'd made in the past and made plans for future ones. Papaw watched football and Grandma went antiquing. Papaw fell asleep in his chair on Saturday afternoons, listening to big band music. Grandma drifted off while reading a book.

I'm in Winston...and it's July 31st, 2010. And my Ma (as my children call her) is battling cancer. Right now, she's sleeping. But when she has an awake moment, I crawl up on her bed and talk. We talk about little things here and there. Politics...casey (her dog)...a little of nothing...a little of something. She's not very comfortable right now. She's tired a lot. But, she would be, considering the side effects of the radiation treatments she's had. I'm not disappointed. I'm truly amazed at how quickly our lives have flown by. She's made such an impact on my life. A comforting impact. One full of so many funny memories.

Lola Ruth is really very good at recounting the funny memories, too. I could listen to the same recount of funny memories over and over again...and have! It's like hanging on to your favorite book because you don't grow tired of the story, and the funny parts are always funny...and comforting. None of that on this visit, but it's been part of my very blessed childhood, and I treasure that.

I could go on and on...

But my Aunt Debbie just came in. And I'm going to talk to her.

And make more memories.

Reality

I'm sure some of you don't approve of shows like "The Bachelorette". Believe me, I think the morals of this show leave much to be desired. But being facinated with human behavior and responses, these particular dating shows are interesting to me. The show that is running right now features "Ali". She's beautiful and seems like a sweet, sincere girl who is seeking love for all the right reasons. But I'm not really a believer that circumstances set up and determine one's path for love. I believe God does that! So while I admit that there is a draw for me in watching these shows and trying to determine what motivates these young people to participate, it's more intriguing to gage action versus reaction...reality versus pipe dream...truth versus fantasy. Thus, I haven't actually watched The Bachelorette on tv this season...I've watched several of the episodes online. Most recently, I watched Ali's response to "Frank", as he (being one of the 3 final potential mates) broke her heart by leaving the show in favor of reuniting with his ex-girlfriend.

And I had a "God-moment".

Not that I shouldn't be watching this show. Not that it's made up of the fantasy we carry in our mind that being accepted by a mate is the ultimate form of being loved and accepted in this life (because it's utterly NOT!).

The God moment came while I was sympathizing with Ali's cries and questions of "why?". Indeed!

WHY?

Why do we trust God so little sometimes, that we cry when He removes something from our lives that we thought belonged there? Hasn't He promised to work ALL things together for good? Has He ever failed us?

God is almost like a fantasy. His promises are everything our hearts and minds have ever longed for, and so much more, that we can't even comprehend His love, fully. He satisfies that longing for love and acceptance that only He can. He created that special place within us, so it only makes sense that only He can fill it! God surpasses our fantasies...our hope and dreams. He's the real deal. And He promises to never EVER leave us. We will never shed one tear because He rejected us...or because He left us behind. That promise is, of course, for those who love Him and have a personal relationship with Christ.

Finally, near the end of the episode, Ali states that she now knows that Frank is definitely not the man for her, and that the two remaining men are absolutely supposed to be there. And I had to chuckle...

because when we trust God enough to accept our daily lives with His perspective, only then do we grasp love and acceptance the way He intended us to.

And that's 100% reality.

Sunday!

My Mom and my Ma have encouraged me for a while, to share the day to day Jones Crew happenings, but my heart is so full sometimes and I consider it therapeutic to share that. It's been harder to write like that since I started working again, 1 year ago. But everyday life can be every bit as inspiring! Things at church were a little nutty today! I love my job...I work with anywhere from 50 to 80 volunteers (depending on whether people show up or not!). There are so many great things I get to do within the boundaries of the ministry I serve and the crazy-incredibly creative Lady that I work for, that I can't begin to list it all here!!! But it starts off with making coffee around 7:30am on the 3 days I work each work week, and ends AND begins again with loving on all those people, the parents, and the children, every Sunday morning from 9am to 1pm or so. I LOVE IT!!! It thrills my soul to love on these people...to serve the Lord this way. Some Sundays, it IS a labor of love in the sweaty kind of way. TODAY was one of those days!!!
After arriving at church, I was greeted by some fabulous ladies in Sunday School (I teach a ladies class every Sunday morning at 8am and LOVE IT!!!). I love them. I use the word "love" a lot, I know, but it's the only way I can describe these awesome opportunities and people that God has placed into my life!!! After neatly (and shockingly) putting away a nice game of "Last Word" (it was game-day, and by "putting away", I mean I WON...NOT YOU SHANNON!!!!), I ran down to begin the routine of getting the children's helpers and rooms taken care of. We wound up with 11 crawlers, so I had to keep moving people over to that room...it was a little bit crazy! Over the course of the session, I wound up running to The Crows Nest in the sanctuary...during service...to post 3 different kiddies numbers so that their parents could pick them up. I must have lost 5 pounds and a few brain cells by the time I ran down the steps on that last call! Made up for that at Bojangles on the way home, though... So after a few crying little ones, and one poop-in-the-floor incident...and countless miles of running (my brain gets fuzzy on the actual mileage), I'm home resting, so I can begin the process again. It's crazy, I know, but all this is "me" time. Being the mom of 5 doesn't lend itself to such, so my version of "me" time is probably a lot different than yours. Doing paperwork, database entries & changes, and preparing snacks, are all very satisfying tasks to me, and that's only the beginning! Compared to biting my tongue in the face of my pre-teen who is currently experiencing a VERY good reason to be ill and hateful, LADIES, persuading sometimes crabby people to serve little ones cheerfully, is nothing short of a big slice of apple pie!!! And I LOVE apple pie!!! There we go with that word again...

A Fresh Drink of Water

I love hydrangea. As long as I can remember, I've been facinated by their "snowball" appearance and tiny, delicate blooms. Growing up, there was one hydrangea bush in particular that caught my fancy. It was located on my Dad's home property in Hendersonville, NC. And as a child, I was comforted by the return of the big blue hydrangea bush each spring.

Even now, hydrangea bushes capture my mind, and because they symbolize a measure of comfort to me, they also make my heart beat a little bit faster.

For years, I've marveled over how quickly the hydrangeas get dehydrated. Their leaves droop, and the blooms look incredibly sad! Just as amazing is how quickly they re-hydrate. Within an hour or so of being watered, they literally perk up and look as if they are "on parade". Which, I suppose they are...to display the glory of God's creation!

God spoke to me about my precious hydrangeas.

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Just as the hydrangeas need fresh water everyday to make them healthy and cheerful, I need a word of fresh living water everyday, too. That will keep me spiritually healthy and my demeanor will definitely be more cheerful! We all need a fresh Word from God everyday.

Jesus stood and cried out, saying, "If anyone thirsts, let him come to Me and drink. He who believes in Me, as the scripture has said, out of his heart will flow rivers of living water". John 7:37-38

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Our purpose in life is to know God and to make Him known. If we don't experience His living water each day, then how in the garden world (and ours) can we do that? There's no question that we are thirsty! His desire is for us to be filled to overflow into the lives of others, much the way the hydrangea bush works all it's parts together to show His glory.

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We have 9 hydrangea bushes on our property. And they are sweet reminders of what God can and will do in our lives if we'll choose to sit with Him and be refreshed.

There's nothing like a fresh

drink of water.